just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
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