Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Randomize
