Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Randomize
