Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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