I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Randomize
