so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Randomize
