Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
I cut my penus on the lid.
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
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