Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
Randomize
