You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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