Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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