My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
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