I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
i drank out of a bidet.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
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