butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
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