I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
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