6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
