hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
did you just send me my own nude
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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