i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
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