Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
Randomize
