no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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