my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
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