And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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