You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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