So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
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