Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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