I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
