This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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