here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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