I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
Randomize
