But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
Randomize