just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
Randomize