things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
Randomize
