wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Randomize
