Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
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