ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
