mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
When my options for Friday night are being a 3rd wheel or bringing a gay man as my date i need to focus on other things in life like having a successful career.
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
