Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Randomize
