great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
