Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
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