Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
