Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Randomize
