Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
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