i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
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