my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
