Banned from zoo.
Again?
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Randomize
