I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Randomize
