do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
