U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
Randomize
