Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize