we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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