um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
where are my eyebrows?
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
