is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
